“Yes, ma’am”, “No ma’am”, “Thank you”, “No thank you” are these words common practice in your day-to-day life? I have had conversations lately with ladies where they will ask me to stop saying, “yes ma’am” to them, because we are close in age, then I have also had conversations with older people who were surprised by my saying those things. The simple fact is, unfortunately good manners are not common practice in today’s society. This is sad, good manners are like a good name, a part of our character that should be Christ-like.
There are other areas of life that this applies to, I have always been taught to be grateful for what others do for you and in return to show your appreciation through the written word. I am the queen of Thank you notes. I believe that a short well written thank you note is sure to make someone feel appreciated for their deeds or actions. Showing gratitude in even the smallest of circumstances makes a real impact on those around you and helps them to see your Godly character shining through.
When doing some research online about this topic, one of the manners that I came across that many people today seem to hold up in importance is for children to not talk while adults are talking. Also, for us as adults even, to not interrupt each other when talking. I am sure we have all encountered both situations and agree that good manners are important.
I think it is our duty as mothers of a new generation to teach our children these things. Hold up in importance the daily practices that we so often have let go by the wayside these days. Godly respect is important and should be made a priority. We are called to “train up a child in the way that they should go.” Going with good manners will help them a great deal in the days ahead. It is our duty as parents to instill in our children good practices.
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Alyssa Avant is a Christian, speaker, blogger and podcaster. She creates guides to help moms encourage their daughters and help to “turn the hearts of girls towards God”. Help your daughter find the social graces and charms of days past with Alyssa’s Christian Charm School Workbook. Available in ebook or hard copy.
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I do the “ma’am/sir” thing at work all the time. I haven’t taught my kids that one yet, still trying to get “yes please” and “no thank you” down! LOL It’s slow going, but we’re trying to instill at least SOME politeness in them.
I never did understand thank you notes. I always said thank you when I got whatever and didn’t understand why I then had to write a note. LOL
One thing that we have tried to do is say “ma’am” and “sir” TO our children. If we expect them to say it to us, then we have to exemplify it before them not just in our interactions with other people, but in our interactions with them as well. People give me funny looks when I say “ma’am” to a five or seven-year-old or “sir” to a two-year-old, but it stands out. It makes an impact.
As for thank you notes, TK – I’m horrible with them and always have been! But, I’m determined to do better and to teach my children to do better. I’m even considering making it a school task to write thank-you notes to two or three people a week, even if we have to come up with a reason to thank people!
We absolutely use “ma’am” and sir! I’m 26 and I still use those when talking to adults. Our daughter is 10 months old but when anyone ‘asks’ her something or compliments her, we say “thank you”, “please”, “ma’am” and “sir” in response. She may not understand what we’re saying yet, but she will one day.
We don’t say ma’am TO our daughter. Ma’am and sir are words of respect for your elders. She will learn to use them by our example and interaction with others and our instruction.
As for Thank You notes, we absolutely send them. I’m from the South and it’s just in your genes to send thank you notes…even if you received the gift in front of the giver and said thank you. It’s just a courtesy and respect thing. Plus…who doesn’t love getting a little note saying thank you in the mail!
I don’t ever remember my Mother telling us to talk that way, but I just know I always have. I probably learned from her example. I don’t teach my kids to be polite, but because I am they just pick up on it.
Nell